Ask Alex : I made a mistake
Just For Fun, Lifestyle June 27, 2021
Hey Alex!
I’ve made a huge mistake and it is ruining my reputation. I didn’t realize that people would talk so much and now I don’t know what to do. I don’t want to say exactly what I did because it is so embarrassing, but I need help on how to fix it. How do I move on and get people to stop talking about me?
Sincerely,
Embarrassed
Hey Embarrassed!
Without knowing the mistake, I can’t advise on exactly how to fix it but I can tell you how to cope and move on.
It’s simple, you move on. We are all human and there are very few of us who have gone through life without making a mistake that either devastated us at the time or if known would have caused devastation.
Every single person who is talking about you now, has something that would become the center of gossip if brought to light. It probably says just as much about them that they gossip, as your mistake says about you. Might even say more about them.
Don’t worry about what people are saying, the next big mistake will put the name of someone else in their mouth and in the long run do you really care what these people think?
You can’t control how others act. You can only control yourself. Make amends if you need to. Take care not to make the same mistake twice and face the gossip head on by acting like it isn’t getting to you.
Sincerely,
Alex
You can check out more of Alex’s advice by clicking here : Ask Alex : Fed Up With The World
If you enjoy reading Alex’s advice, send in your questions or situations to [email protected]. Each week, Alex will answer a new question or provide some friendly advice on issues we deal with every day. Whether it’s serious, fun, interesting, or you’re just stuck, send in your questions to Ask Alex for a little bit of outside perspective on life.
Ask Alex : Afraid of Losing Job
Just For Fun, Lifestyle May 30, 2021
Hey Alex!
My boss is having to make budget cuts at work and this means probably having to let someone go. There is a girl I work with that will be leaving in a couple of months when she has her baby and on top of that her husband makes really good money, so she doesn’t actually need the job. She’s one of the highest paid employees here, which means the boss would be saving even more by going ahead and letting her go. Should I bring these points up to my boss? I’m just afraid of losing my job.
Sincerely,
Don’t Want To Get Fired
Hey Don’t Want To Get Fired!
If you are afraid of losing your job the absolute worst thing you can do is tell your boss why other people should be let go before you. The only conversation you should have with your boss in this case is why you should stay and that’s only if your boss brings it up.
It’s none of your business how much your coworkers make and even less of your business on how they spend their money or whether or not they “need the job”. To bring any of this up is going to paint you in a very bad light in the eyes of your employer.
I would say that your boss is already factoring in that your coworker will be leaving and will be making their decision based on the best outcome for longevity of the company. Unless your employer specifically asks for your opinion, I think it would be in your best interest to say nothing and show your value through your quality of work.
Sincerely,
Alex
You can check out more of Alex’s advice by clicking here : Ask Alex : Fed Up With The World
If you enjoy reading Alex’s advice, send in your questions or situations to [email protected]. Each week, Alex will answer a new question or provide some friendly advice on issues we deal with every day. Whether it’s serious, fun, interesting, or you’re just stuck, send in your questions to Ask Alex for a little bit of outside perspective on life.
Ask Alex : Dating after death of a spouse
Just For Fun, Lifestyle May 9, 2021
Hey Alex!
When is it too soon to date again? I lost the love of my life to cancer a little over a year ago. She was my everything and she was everything to our kids. I’ve dealt with the loneliness by being extra invested in my girls but my youngest is going off to college next year and I will truly be alone. I haven’t really been interested in finding someone new but being completely by myself scares me. I feel like I need to get back out there but I’m afraid it’s too soon and I don’t want my kids to feel like I am trying to rush to replace their mom.
Sincerely,
I Still Miss Her
Hey I Still Miss Her!
I am so sorry for your loss. Some people in our lives are truly irreplaceable and you need to first accept that you will not be replacing anyone. When the time comes to date again realize that you are building something new and not filling what is gone.
There is no time frame that is acceptable when it comes to dating after loss, whether due to death or even divorce. Everyone is different and you will know when you are ready. It sounds like you aren’t though and that is perfectly okay too.
Don’t date someone just to fill the void of loneliness. Instead go out and make friends. Find new hobbies or interests to focus on and find like minded people to do these things with. Friends and family can help rebuild you while you grieve. A relationship, if you aren’t ready, is only going to provide a band-aid for the hurt that you still need to process.
When the time is right you will know it and when the person is right you will know it then too.
Your girls are older. Have a talk with them when the time comes and you start dating again. Let them know that you still love their mother very much and are not trying to replace her. They will want you to be happy and even though they will have to go through their own processing of the situation, eventually they will understand.
Sincerely,
Alex
You can check out more of Alex’s advice by clicking here : Ask Alex : I’m in love and he is moving
If you enjoy reading Alex’s advice, send in your questions or situations to [email protected]. Each week, Alex will answer a new question or provide some friendly advice on issues we deal with every day. Whether it’s serious, fun, interesting, or you’re just stuck, send in your questions to Ask Alex for a little bit of outside perspective on life.
Ask Alex : I’m in love and he is moving
Just For Fun, Lifestyle May 2, 2021
Hey Alex!
I recently met a guy who I know is moving across the country in a month. We’ve gone out a few times and really like him so much! I’m afraid too much. I’m getting attached and I know it’s going to hurt when he leaves. I’m afraid to spend any more time with him while he’s still here but I also want to see him so bad. I don’t want to waste my time getting attached knowing that he is just going to leave. What should I do?
Sincerely,
Falling in Love
Hey Falling In Love!
Get those feelings in check! You knew going into it that your time together would probably be short. Be happy that you are getting to spend some time with someone who makes you have the feels and don’t worry so much about what the future holds.
Every relationship is a chance to learn and to grow. This sounds like an opportunity for you to work on managing your emotions to be able to get the most out of any given situation. If you can focus on just being in the present moment without expectations you will enjoy your time so much more.
This might be a chance to see what you do want from a relationship and give you a basis of comparison so that you don’t settle in the future. It also might be a chance to gain a life long friend.
Speaking of the future, you have no way of knowing exactly what that holds for you or for him. The future doesn’t exist because it hasn’t happened yet. So there is always a possibility that he is the one, but I am a firm believer in what is meant to be, will be. Don’t try to force it and for sure don’t worry about it.
I wouldn’t write him off because you are scared of feeling hypothetically hurt down the road. Instead, enjoy the time you have with him and take it for what it is. Feel grateful that in the present moment you are spending your time with someone who makes you feel good.
Sincerely,
Alex
You can check out more of Alex’s advice by clicking here : Ask Alex : Should I report the coach?
If you enjoy reading Alex’s advice, send in your questions or situations to [email protected]. Each week, Alex will answer a new question or provide some friendly advice on issues we deal with every day. Whether it’s serious, fun, interesting, or you’re just stuck, send in your questions to Ask Alex for a little bit of outside perspective on life.